Men and the church

Speaking on leadership from Acts 20 yesterday I made some pretty pointed comments to the men related to their role as leaders in every area of life, including the church. I want to follow up a bit on those comments.

USA Today came out with an article last month on the discrepancy between the % of men v. women in churches today. ClearView is stronger in this area than the average church. We have a healthy ratio, I believe, in men to women.

I have heard several comments on this since the release of the article by USA Today and other media. I was in Belize this past March on a mission trip. We saw an extreme example of the problem of fewer men in church, but I believe it gives us some insight into what is going on here in the states in the same arena. In Belize, we might have had 20 - 30 adults inside the church building during services. Maybe 4 or 5 of those would be men. However, if you looked just outside the door of the church there would be another 10 - 15 men sitting in bicycles listening to all that was going on. I saw that as a snapshot of what is going on in the church in America.

Why would these men simply sit outside during service and not enter the building? Were they afraid of the building? I don't think so. We had a men's dinner one night and 45 men showed up to eat dinner in the very building they would sit outside of on Sundays and for other worship services.

But the decorations inside the church screamed, "this is for women only". They had flowers on the podium and lace curtains (big ones) behind the pulpit. The night we had the men's dinner they brought out some speakers and played (very loud) some contemporary christian music (it was in Spanish, but I asked and they said it was Christian) the guys could relate to. I asked why they didn't play the same music for their worship services. Never really got a clear answer to that one. But I can't tell you how often someone there bemoaned the fact that so few men would come to church.

With leadership in the church having been abdicated over the centuries by men to women, we have seen a feminization of church. I have preached in hundreds of churches over the past 20 years. Many of the dying churches especially decry the lack of involvement by the men in the church. Many were smaller and struggling churches. Women had taken most of the leadership roles. So guess what services felt like? They felt like women designed and produced them. There would be flowers in the front of the church. The choir wore robes with stoles (I think that's what you call them) that matched the carpet and walls. On a couple of occasions I had to politely refuse to wear a flower if I were asked to preach on Easter. The worship folder covers (bulletins) would have pictures of flowers or some open field with ... flowers. [As a side note, please don't send flowers to my funeral. Give $$ to a ministry of some kind if you feel the need to give something.] Words like "precious" and "sweet" are thrown around in music and sermons. Great for women but men don't use that kind of language in their every day lives. And then we wonder, "Where did all the men go?" "Why don't more men come to church?"

This is one reason I love preaching in a room that transforms into a gym during other days of the week. It doesn't feel so ... well ... feminine. Along the same lines, I am grateful for a worship leader who is a man's man. Michael Smith leads worship that men, as well as women, can relate to. Drums and guitars are simply more masculine than a pipe organ.

Men, God called us to lead. So let's lead. As we learned yesterday, we lead with a humble spirit, with compassion and love for those God has placed in our care. Men's men stepping up to the plate will propel any church into a better future for Christ. Reach the men and the family will follow.

I would end with this. Thank God for the women who have and who do step up. Without them, no telling what kind of mess we would be in our churches. I am appreciative of all they do and will do. This is not about women backing down from all they do. This is about men stepping up to what we have been called to do ... lead!